For most of my adult life, I’ve been chasing something I couldn’t quite name. I wouldn’t call it happiness exactly, more like steadiness. A sense that my life, with all its moving parts—family, career, responsibilities—was being lived on purpose, rather than just happening to me.

That quiet search for clarity eventually led me somewhere unexpected: to a philosophy that’s over two thousand years old, yet feels like it was written for the challenges of modern life.

How I Found Stoicism

I first came across Stoicism on social media, specifically Ryan Holiday and The Daily Stoic during one of those restless phases where I was looking for something to help me slow down and refocus. It started with a short quote I saw online—something from Marcus Aurelius—and a few paragraphs of Ryan’s reflection.

It wasn’t overcomplicated. It wasn’t trying to sell an idealized version of success or calm. It was just simple, practical wisdom. And it landed.

The quote was this:

“You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

That single idea stopped me. It made me start thinking more deeply about how I was living. I’d been spending energy trying to control things that were never mine to control—outcomes at work, other people’s opinions, the thousand little irritations of everyday life.

But that line was a reminder: my mind is mine. My effort is mine. My attitude is mine.

That’s where it started. I bought The Daily Stoic soon after, and it’s been part of my routine ever since—one page each morning, paired with coffee and a quiet few minutes before the day really begins.

Now, I’m on my second read-through, and it’s remarkable how differently passages land the second time. The same words, but new, deeper meaning. That’s something I’ve come to appreciate about Stoicism—it meets you where you are.

From Ryan Holiday to Marcus Aurelius

After a few months of reading The Daily Stoic, I became curious about the original sources—the ancient thinkers who started it all: Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Epictetus.

I picked up Meditations to learn from one of the greatest Stoic thinks of all time. It is now part of daily routine. I can see why Ryan Holiday calls it a lifelong companion. It’s not a book you conquer—it’s one you return to over the years as you change and grow.

The parts that have stayed with me are the reminders to stay grounded, to act with kindness, and to keep perspective.

“Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.”

That line, in particular, has become a kind of anchor. It’s not about talking about values; it’s about living them, quietly and consistently.

Why Stoicism Resonated With Me

What pulled me into Stoicism wasn’t just the history (I do love history), it was the practicality. It didn’t tell me to detach from the world or reject emotion. It simply offered a framework for managing life’s constant change.

It’s about clarity in the middle of chaos.

As a father and husband, that’s something I need every day. Life isn’t calm. There’s always another task, another challenge, another worry waiting around the corner. Stoicism doesn’t remove that—it helps me face it with more composure.

When Marcus Aurelius wrote that “the obstacle is the way,” he meant that challenges aren’t interruptions to life; they are life. I’ve found that idea surprisingly comforting. It reframes frustration and difficulty as opportunities to practice patience, courage, and perspective. The Obstacle Is The Way was the very next book I read by Ryan Holiday and it really helped me understand what the ancient Stoics meant.

The Four Virtues That Guide Me

At the heart of Stoic philosophy are four virtues: Wisdom, Courage, Justice, and Temperance. Over time, I am incorporating these into my day-to-day life as quiet guide-posts that help me be the man I want to be. I will be diving into each of these more in future posts.

I don’t claim to be Stoic in the full sense of the word. I still get frustrated. I still overthink things. I still have days where I’m short-tempered or distracted.

The difference now is that I notice it sooner. I can catch myself in the moment and ask: “Is this within my control?”

That small question has changed the tone of so many days. It doesn’t make problems disappear, but it makes them more manageable.

A Philosophy for Modern Life

What I love most about Stoicism is how relevant it feels, even now. It was written by people who lived in a completely different world—emperors, slaves, statesmen—but the challenges they describe are exactly the ones we face: stress, ego, distraction, uncertainty.

It’s not about pretending to be emotionless or unshakable. It’s about cultivating calm in motion.

In an age of constant noise, Stoicism rewards quiet reflection. It asks you to slow down, to think before reacting, to value character over comfort, which I think a lot of us are looking for.

Sometimes that looks like a short pause before sending an email. Sometimes it’s choosing patience when everything in you wants to argue. Sometimes it’s just taking a deep breath in the middle of chaos and remembering: “I control how I respond.”

On the Path

I’m very early in my study of Stoicism so am obviously far from perfect at this. But Stoicism has helped me replace a sense of restless striving with a quieter kind of ambition—one that’s measured not by what I achieve, but by how I carry myself along the way.

The daily readings, the reflection, the journaling—it’s all part of an ongoing process of becoming just a little better, a little calmer, a little clearer each day.

Marcus Aurelius wrote:

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”

That line sums up what I’ve taken from this journey so far. Stoicism hasn’t given me all the answers, but it’s given me the tools to live the questions with patience and perspective.

It’s not about being unshakable—it’s about being anchored. And for me, that’s enough.

If you are looking for a journal to start your journey, check out this one I have purchased from Amazon